I know it’s, like, the middle of June right now, but I’m already obsessing over the 4th of July.
What am I doing for the 4th this year? I have no clue, but I have ordered this outfit, so I’m going to be having fun regardless.
Independence Day is one of the holidays, along with New Years, that I take very seriously. It pretty much starts off the whole summer, so you really have to make sure you don’t squander it. I WAS planning on going to LA this year, but tragically, it was not meant to be. That’s sad because my all time favorite 4th of July was spent in LA.
I was 17, and had just driven across the entire country in my tiny red car with Brett. For weeks I had slept in nothing but motel beds, and I was sick of it.
We didn’t have enough cash to spring for the really good hotels, so we stayed at an array of Highway motels- occasionally registering as man and wife, or father and underage daughter depending on which story scored us a better discount. Man, those were some good times. It was just like the road trip in Lolita, except with Holiday Inn instead of The Enchanted Hunters.
Anyway, I was just dying to get to my new place and sleep on a real bed! Of course, I was 17 and retarded so I totally forgot to call my roommate ahead of time, and showed up at my new place only to discover that she was away for the weekend on some sort of task force or lesbian cruise or something.
I decided I’d have to settle for staying with Brett, and sharing his mattress on the floor with him.
So I’m cruising up the I-10, on July 4th in the late afternoon, blaring Tom Petty’s Freefalling and singing along at the top of my lungs. You know, the usual. I stop at this light, and realize the car next to me is watching my impromptu performance and laughing their asses off. I glare at them and start to roll up my window, when the (extremely hot) guy in the passenger seat apologizes and invites me to join them on a boat cruise out to Catalina Island to watch the fireworks.
I, of course, agreed. I followed the car out to a nice abandoned lot off the highway, and was introduced to Extremely Hot Guy and his extended Iranian family, who arrived in two car loads.
We all board the boat and get to know each other on the way out to Catalina. We spend the day on the island tanning and drinking wine spritzers. EHG is a 38 year old Iranian money something who lives in the Hollywood Hills, and once I explain my situation to him, he offers me a place to sleep until my room mate comes back. That’s the thing about Californians… so friendly.
So we all watch the fireworks together, EHG and I making out on occasion, and take the boat back to our cars.
I follow EHG up to his (giant, exquisite) house in the hills, where he makes me dinner and has his maid do my 3 weeks worth of laundry. I immediately crawl into his giant bed after dinner and pass out. In the morning, EHG brings me breakfast in bed.
When I’m done I wander his mansion, and finally find him folding my laundry for me. (Incidentally, I later noticed that Wednesday was missing from my day of the week underwear set.)
I spent 2 more days with EHG at his place, before my roommate came home and let me in. I somehow managed to pull off never sleeping with him… how, I may never know.
I’ll always remember that Fourth of July, because I truly celebrated my independence.
Not only did I know I was becoming an adult… I was getting a pretty clear picture of what kind of adult I was going to be.
